Phase 2020.

12.27.2020 Dear dad, I think this year may have been my favorite Christmas. Or at least one of the best in a long time. Maybe that sounds crazy or impossible in a year ravaged by a pandemic. I know there has been so much loss and heartache. I do not intend at all to dismiss […]

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What was I scared of?

12.11.2020 Dear dad, I didn’t see you. Mom asked me if I wanted to. I said no. I was scared. I was scared of you. I was scared of me. What would happen to me seeing your lifeless body when seeing your body become lifeless had threatened to ruin everything inside of me? Your voice […]

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5v5 brings out the worst in us.

11.13.2020 Dad, We played a five versus five tournament at training last night. With the rest of the season postponed until the spring, we don’t have any games to prepare for, so training has been mostly technical activities and small games to goal. After the fall season was over in college, we often would do […]

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A far green country.

9.13.2020 Dad, A far green country. It is a track on The Lord of the Rings film score, but it is also Denmark. In the movie, the far green country is the Shire, where the hobbits live. It is where Bilbo, Frodo and Sam are from. At the end of the first Hobbit movie, the […]

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The arena.

8.19.20 Dad, I have been waiting on this a long time. Mulling over when and how to express something so lofty. So precious as life. Like holding a bird in your hands. Cupping them firmly enough so he doesn’t fly away but gently so as not to harm him. I think the truth is often […]

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Upper room.

5.31.2020 Dad, I’m still only playing at love. I’m still only playing with black lives. I’m not trying to know their world but pull them into my own. Use the Dream [Between the World and Me] that burdens them to clothe their beautiful black bodies and redeem their inhumane lives. But it cannot. The white […]

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Helheimr!

5.5.2020 Dear dad, I suppose you, and the people (I know, our letters are indeed seen by more eyes than our own), are probably tired of hearing about movies. The thing is, I just can’t help it. When I watch movies or read books, pieces of their stories inevitably and loudly speak to my own. […]

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Pandiculation.

4.11.20 Dear dad, I do not believe it a coincidence that the Webster dictionary word of the day today is “pandiculation.” What in the world right? At first, I wasn’t sure how this had anything to do with anything. I opened the app on my phone to look up a couple words from the book […]

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Screwtape and Me: the opportune moment

My Merciful Father, Another note the Fallen One and his demons let slip. I believe he has them riled up and furiously working to keep souls from realizing the ever so beautiful truth of the events unfolding this week. He knows the danger quiet and intentionality poses to his house. Our beloved people have possibly […]

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Life from the grave.

4.1.20 Dear dad, You would have enjoyed the day today. April entered 2020 with sun and warmth, promising light and life. I went to the post office to drop off a couple letters. Not gonna lie it was nice to drive again. Rolled the windows down, hair whipped in the wind, radio bumped on max […]

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